The disgraced best-selling author Craig Silvey has revealed he was abused as a child in a 9,000-word apology published after he was jailed for child exploitation offences.The young adult novelist was sentenced on Monday to seven months’ imprisonment, after being charged in January and subsequently pleading guilty to distributing and possessing depraved child exploitation material.The 44-year-old writer posted an article on his Substack titled “My Apology”.He said that throughout his life he had always been able to find the right words, “but articulating the depth of my contrition and the enormity of my remorse feels beyond my aptitude for language”.“I am guilty of these offences. I am appalled and mortified by my conduct, and I am deeply, profoundly sorry,” he wrote.“I want to acknowledge that my engagement with this material is reprehensible and indefensible.“It is re-traumatising to victims, and perpetuates a cycle of harm.”Silvey, a father of three, said he betrayed the trust of thousands of people across the country, including those who had read his books, many of whom reacted to his offending with “shock, dismay, disgust, concern and disappointment”.“I am painfully aware of the possible assumption that my offence must have been informed by a horrible and inappropriate attraction, and that my behaviour must then be connected to sinister and ulterior motivations,” he wrote.“I assure you this is not the case at all.”Silvey said he had carried a history of “trauma, shame and anxiety” through most of his life.“As a child, I experienced emotional neglect, violence, and sexual abuse,” he wrote.Silvey said he suffered a “crisis of mental health and a destructive, despairing breakdown” before he offended.He was found with numerous sexually explicit photos and videos of children and adults on his laptop and mobile phone when police raided his home in Fremantle.He also engaged in an online conversation with a person he believed shared his interest in child exploitation material, telling them he preferred boys aged five-plus before adding that “eight was the perfect age”.“I want to make out with little ones,” the author said in one message.“I haven’t had any experience, I’m sad to say.“I’m a bit obsessed.”Silvey, who has been shortlisted for the Miles Franklin literary award and the International Dublin literary award, is best known for his 2009 coming‑of‑age novel Jasper Jones, which had been considered a modern Australian classic and was adapted into a feature film and several stage productions.He has also been widely recognised for other books, including Rhubarb, Honeybee – which won the Australian Indie Book Award in 2021 – and the children’s novel Runt, which was also made into a film.